Monday, November 10, 2003
:(
"我不愿放弃却要故意默默允许 我答应自己爱你的心 绝口不提.....
爱到了底 痛的是我的真心"
imagine how painful i was behind my parents in the car this morning, trying not to cry when my dad tuned in to the radio station and this Ronald Cheng song's "绝口不提 爱你" was aired.
feel so useless. no matter i keep telling myself to be strong. i will like tearing now and then at work.
"Thanks" that I had diarrhoea and gastric at work, which makes my body turn cold, i can get away from my colleagues suspicions that there was some other thing that made me cried. They all thought i was sick.
true i was ill, but the gastric pain can't compared to my heart pain.
i can't really work.. My mind wasn't there. Like yesterday, i din really noticed much taht my Chairman of my club wanted me to create a "yahoo group' ( must be "yahoo group). i was doing halfway thenn i recalled taht yahoo groups had some setting problems for those without yahoo account, so i switched to creating "MSN group" instead, thinking that the main purpose is to create an online group, so any website provider doesn't matters.
To my surprised, my chairman sms me that next time I made changes like that must inform him first, and that is as a form of respect , though he meant that as a friend, not as a chairman.
Yah , i got upset, cos it was my fault. Simple instructions I can't follow.
Even today, at my office, I copied a file which i took a whole morning to type out and had delete it the next second when my mind was wandering off......
Dunno y this time it hurts more. I used to think once u had a heartbreak, you might have immunity, at least it won't hurt so much the second time. Yah in Feb i had my first heart break. This time, the feeling was like you were falling, then someone reached out to save you, but then he let go of you and you went crashing down......
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~*Harmonie's Sentimental World --心情日记*~ 
